Today is September 21. I have had an ear problem for a few weeks. My ears started feeling itchy inside a couple weeks ago. I assumed it was allergies. I tried everything to scratch them. I put cuetips in my ears and tootpicks too and it felt good to scratch them. Last thursday it got really bad and I started feeling a lump behind my ear. I decided to go to the dr friday cause I couldn't hear out of one ear. He said I had an ear infection so he prescribed antibiotics and an ear drop. I had to go all weekend without the medicine because I didn't have money. The ear drops were 45 dollars and no way could I afford them. My ears felt like water was trapped inside. It was horrible so I bought some swimmers eardrops and used them. OMG. They are made with 95 percent alchohol. Talk about burn.

I finally called my dr wed and asked him to prescribe a cheaper ear drop which he did. I started using it and my ear is doing a little better. I still can't hear out of one ear but I hope in a week my ears will be back to normal.
I just hope Sam doesn't get this ear problem. He hasn't been sick in forever. He's one of the healthiest 3 year olds I know.

Today is September 14. I am pulling my toenails off. I have no idea why I do that but I can't stop it. It is usually my big toenails and my small toenails. I cannot stand to feel a piece of sharp nail so I will rip it off and I usually end up tearing the entire nail off. I am working on my toe beside my big toe right now. It is almost halfway off. I hope nobody knows me.


My weekend totally sucked. I started my damn period damit. I hurt so bad yesterday. My husband is a truck driver and has been out on the road for a long time working for a friend of his. He coteams with his brother and they do not get along so he is nottoo happy. He was suppose to get last weeks check yesterday. He actually should have gotten it a week ago yesterday. We expected to have it in the bank last monday and wrote a few checks for food and ended up bouncing 3 checks. One for 7 dollars, one for 8 dollars and one for 20 dollars. The bank charged me 31 dollars for each one. I was so pissed. I ended up paying 100 bucks for bank charges.

Thursday I thought my money from my paycheck would have gone in my account so I put 10 in gass and was picking up 2 packs of cigarettes for my sister in law. When I tried to use my debit card he said it was declined. I have never had my debit card declines. Talk about embarressing. I had pumped 10 dollars in gas and only had 7 dollars. I dug out all my change and all I had was 7 bucks. I handed him back the cigarettes and gave him 7 dollars and asked him if I could pay it tommorow. He was so nice about it and said of course. They know me since I go there all the time.

I felt like a welfare mother all week with no money. It's amazing what you can do all week when you don't have money. I barely had gas money.

I was supposeto meet his friend yesterday at 4pm. I was realy sick with an ear infection and went to the dr so i got off work early. I didn't get my prescriptions for antibiotics and ear drops because I didn't want to spend any til I was sure we got Jeff's check. I had to make sure we had enough to pay our car payment or they are going to take my car and I only owe 4 more months.
I can't even pay our phone bill and they disconnected it. I can't pay any bills since my check is taken all for the house payment and a major loan we took out to pay off credit card bills. I would have had 200 dollars left on my check if I hadn't had to pay those bank charges. I had 100 left and had to pay the dr 20. That left me 80 and then Jeff had to take 50 out to fix a flat tire on his friends truck. So now we have 30 left. Ronda gave me 60 but I just spent 20. I spent 15 on gas and the other 5 went to donuts and coffee.


I arrived at the meeting place about 15 minutes before 4. I called his friend and he finally answered and I told him I was there. He acted like he really didn't want to talk to me and said I'll call you back in 5 minutes.

I waited and waited and about 4:15 I called him again and he said something about one of the guys that worked there was delivering something and had the truck he was suppose to meet me in. He said darn if I'd known he was going there I would have sent the check with him. This guy works only about a few miles away and I'm thinking why doesn't he just tell me where he works and I can meet him. About 4:30 he calls me again and says the guy won't be coming back right away so could I go home right away and he would send his sisterinlaw to my house with the check.

I hurry home, I don't even pick up Sam because I needed to make sure I got home before his siter in law got there. I wait and I wait and Jeff calls and finds out what is going on and he is so pissed. He says he's quitting cause it's bad enough he makes jeff wait around on him all the time but he's pulling his wifes chain and he doesn't like it.

They never did come over on Friday. Jeff tells me later today that they are suppose to come in the morning on Sunday to give me the checks. I'll believe it when I see it. I had to cancel my presciptions because it was 50 dollars to fill them. My ear is feeling a little better but right now it is starting to burn and sting. I just hope the infection goes away or he gets his check soon.